2000, Japan. Starring Nozomi Ando, Shuichi Yamauchi, Kyusaku Shimada. Directed by Tomoo Haraguchi. Available on DVD (HKFlix).

You know what really ticks me off? I mean, maybe even more than when a film is just plain boring? It's when a movie could have been amazingly cool, or at least pretty neat, except for one single feature which completely torpedoes the whole film and brings everything crashing down into a smoldering pile of mediocrity. It's probably the most frustrating experience of watching a movie, to find something I want to like so much yet can't because of one little thing that, singular though it may be, is so overwhelmingly irksome that it drowns out everything else.

Such was the case with Sakuya, a movie that draws from elements of science fiction, fantasy, and the supernatural "schoolgirl" horror thrillers that have been so popular in Japan since the release of films like The Ring and Birth of the Wizard and manga like Uzumaki, then ruins it all by including quite possibly the most grating, annoying, hideously unenjoyable little kid in the history of Japanese cinema. That right there is a strong statement, mind you. After all, this is the country that gave us Ichiro and the endless parade of Kenny's from the many old Gamera movies. This is a country who's cinema has pushed the envelope in exploring just how irritating a single pre-teen character can be. There is a well-documented history of these precocious brats in Japanese film, and even in the face of all that history and tradition, I still have to rank the snot-nosed little whiner from Sakuya as the worst ever. Ichiro may have been a twerp, but at least we could relate to his daydreams about Monster Island. The kid in this film, however, has no redeeming qualities yet he will not stay out of damn near every scene.

Since we now use our supercomputers for important things like digitally inserting the face of Bruce Lee into new films and completely reinventing the depths to which people will sink to exploit the famous dead, I'd like to see them use the power to one day remove this kid from the film, thus leaving us with a fairly enjoyable supernatural fantasy romp full of cool monsters and a totally bad-ass female lead. Instead, we'll probably just use our computers to figure out how to add more Jar Jar Binks into Empire Strikes Back so that those films retroactively have more to do with the Phantom Menace series of films.

We start off with the eruption of Mt. Fuji, accomplished through some of the best CGI work to appear in a Japanese movie. You really can't go wrong by opening or closing your movie with the eruption of a volcano. Heck, you could do both, even if your movie was about two people discovering love and their passion for dinner theater in the heart of New York City's Soho district. Is there any one Nora Ephram film that would not benefit greatly from a finale in which, after Meg Ryan discovers true happiness, something somewhere gets obliterated by a volcano?

So much the better if said erupting volcano unleashes Rodan or, as in the case of this film, dozens upon dozens of hellish demons and monsters. This is bad news for 18th century Japan, and for any country of any era I suppose. Few and far between are the historical epochs that would have been better off with hundreds of ghouls and goblins running to and fro, I suppose, though in a predictable twist, I can think of very few films that wouldn't benefit from a few more ghouls and goblins, especially those obnoxious Metropolitan type movies in which vacuous young debutantes and society teens get together to discuss their drab, soulless existence as if any of us really give a shit about debutantes and their male hangers-on. I was shocked to discover these sorts of people even still exist, but with that knowledge now in my head thanks to that Whit Stillman asshole, I can firmly say that any movie about them would be much better if it featured goblins. Hell, why not throw the volcano in to boot? Then why not throw Whit Stillman into the volcano? That's for Last Days of Disco, you jackass.

Where was I? Oh yes. Medieval Japan is in a real pickle with all these demons loose. Luckily, there is a family of demon slayers waiting to pick up the magic sword and send the demons packing. The big problem for the slayers is that the magic sword they use to do all their slaying draws its energy from the life force of whoever wields it. I'm sure they just love whatever ancient holy man half-assed his way through the fashioning of that magic weapon. The only way you can recharge the sword and retain your own lifeforce is by killing a fellow human - a crime no self-respecting slayer will commit. Thus, the job of slaying is handed down from generation to generation, and the slayers just keep getting younger.

We first meet Sakuya, the teenage daughter of the current slayer, as her dad is busy facing off against a kappa, the turtle-like goblins of ancient Japanese folklore. Unfortunately for the slayer, he's at the end of his life force and dies before getting the job done. Sakuya, then, takes the sword up herself and makes short work of the beastie and officially becoming the next generation of demon slayer. If you are seeing similarities between this and another story about a cute teenage girl who becomes a slayer of supernatural rakehells and ne'r-do-wells, then that's probably not accidental. Horror aimed at teenage girls is big business in Japan, and Buffy fits the formula perfectly. It's no big surprise, then, that the same basic formula would be adapted to a more distinctly Japanese setting, but while Sakuya definitely owes a tip o' the hat to Buffy, it's not an outright copy, retaining a unique identity thanks to the wealth of Japanese monsters and folklore upon which it can draw.

The entire opening battle is very stylish and dreamlike, full of surreal landscapes and glowing orange skies. All in all, very cool to behold, and a sure sign that, if nothing else, the movie has some pretty tremendous cinematography and art design. Where the movie begins to falter, however, is at the tail-end of this otherwise excellent little opening scene. As Sakuya finishes off the kappa, she hears a baby crying and soon discovers a baby kappa, recently orphaned by the aforementioned slaying. Against all better judgment and the wise council of her elders, Sakuya refrains from killing the baby, adopting as her baby brother and thus opening the door to the introduction of the most intensely annoying character you could possibly imagine.

Months later, the baby has grown up looking more or less human save for the peculiar green dome jutting out of the top of his head - the only real remnant of the fact that he's not human. Well, there's that and the fact that he looks sort of like Kane Kosugi from Pray for Death. While his adopted older sister is a super-cute, sword-wielding bad-ass, little brother Taro seems proficient primarily at pouting and whining. I know this is more or less a movie for kids, despite the fact that crotchety old farts like myself will devour it as well, and that's why they have a little kid in the movie. But even other little kids watching this movie must find Taro grating. When he gets older, the only friends he'll have are the ones who are hoping to use him to scam on his older sister.

Sakuya is preparing for the final push to rid the world of all those demons who escaped from the eruption, a quest that will eventually lead her and her two ninja sidekicks across Japan to a showdown with the Spider Queen, the demon who is in control of all the other demons. Unfortunately, this quest will also involve Taro tagging along, blubbering, whining, and generally behaving like a spoiled brat. Each scene in which he appears - and that includes just about all of them - is dragged down by his very presence. When he is confronted by the Spider Queen, who treats him as she would her own child as she tries to convince him that humans hate him (well, this human sure hated him) and he should join the demons in fighting his own sister, I guess we're supposed to feel for the inner turmoil, the sense of alienation he feels. But since Sakuya has been a kind if slightly stern mentor, and the two ninjas have tolerated his constantly screwing up every situation and complicating matters endlessly, it's hard to sympathize with his "dramatic" momentary change of heart. Instead, he just seems like even more of a little dickweed than before, and that's not a term I use often.

It's really a damn shame, too, because without him, this movie would be pretty damn good. It draws from the same energy and spirit as Keita Amamiya's films, feeling like the little brother of something along the lines of Renegade Robot Ninja and Princess Saki or Moon Over Tao, both of which feature a similar stylistic flair and willingness to gleefully blur the lines between medieval fantasy and science fiction by giving the samurai and ninjas an array of seemingly futuristic weapons like guns and armored vehicles. It's not as good as either of those movies, but it still could have been a solid piece had Taro not stunk up damn near every scene he could get his dirty little kappa hands on. Director Tomoo Haraguchi certainly shows a flair for directing, having done 1991's peculiar Mikadroid as well as working on the special effects for such stylish hits has Uzumaki, Misa The Dark Angel, and even Takeshi Kitano's Brother. His background in make-up and visual effects is obvious, as the hyper-stylized look of the film is astounding. He maintains a brisk pace, leaping from one action scene to the next and making sure everything stays exciting.

The special effects, pulled off by the same team who collaborated to give us the effects from the three recent Gamera films, range from traditionally average to utterly astonishing. These guys really raised the bar for special effects in Japan with the Gamera, and they do their best to keep up with their reputations here despite working on an obviously smaller budget. At their worst, they are the cat demon, which looks like something out of one of those hour-long Kamen Rider movies. Not bad, but obviously the traditional "actor in a big costume" sort of special effect that only works for kids and us forgiving fans of Japanese science fiction.

That's just about the only low part, however, as the rest of the monsters look fantastic. The kappa from the opening scene is top notch, boasting a make-up job that would make even masters like Rick Baker and Steven Wang proud. Groups of decaying zombie samurai look even better as they gallop through the foggy streets at night. And topping it all off is the Spider Queen, who transforms into a gigantic half woman, half spider creature for the big finale. Usually, giant monster effects falter at least a little here and there, but the Spider Queen is pulled off with remarkable results thanks to a combination of CGI, forced perspective, and good ol' fashioned trickery. The level of realism is unbelievable, or should I say, very believable, as she plows through a medieval village during her climactic battle with Sakuya. Not a once does it look like she is demolishing little models or computer effects.

Speaking of computer effects, y'all know I'm not a big fan of them most of the time for anything other than augmenting scenery or generating cool energy blasts, but I have to say they all look pretty damn good here and mesh well with the actual live action shots. Part of the reason they work is because they don't go overboard. While there are tons of computer effects, most of them are the aforementioned details rather than major focal points. While special effects obviously overshadow the actors in a movie of this nature, they don't treat the special effects as if they are the characters (learn a lesson here, George Lucas). The Spider Queen may be realized through the use of some clever CGI and scene matting, but that's still a human acting it all out. Even at their most outlandish, the computer effects never cross the line and become too much. The opening eruption of Mt. Fuji starts out looking a tad cartoonish, but the subsequent destruction of a forested valley and temple is fantastic, as are most of the scenes that follow.

There is one scene in which a number of rather fake and archaic monsters fill the screen, which will, I imagine, look like nothing more than a cheap bunch of monster costumes and puppets to most people, very much out of place amid the far more successful and modern looking effects that are highlighted in this film. What one would be missing, however, is that these are all the monsters from the classic 1960s Daei films 100 Monsters and Big Ghost War. Those two films were absolutely wonderful mythology/fantasy films filled to the rim with countless creatures from the annals of Japanese folklore, and as a fan of those old movies, I was completely delighted and tickled to see them pop up in a pointless but welcome cameo in this film. They're all here - the big headed thing, the weird tongue waggling umbrella with one eye, two arms, and one leg, the woman with the beautiful face on the front of her head and the hideous demon face on the back, and countless others. That scene alone made it worth suffering the thousands insults of Taro.

The action is plentiful and choreographed pretty well. We're not talking high-flying Hong Kong acrobatics here, but Japan has really been improving their action choreography in the past few years - basically, since Keita Amamiya kicked things into high gear. Back in the day, Japanese action choreography was as bad as - if not worse than - American action choreography. I guess everyone learned a thing or two from Hong Kong during the past decade or two, but while American films are happy to simply provide us with watered-down mimicry of John Woo's greatest choreography hits, Japan lifted the kinetic energy and spirit but adapted it to their own style. Sakuya blends the martial action seamlessly with the flashy special effects and more outrageous action.

On the acting front, everyone is passable, at worst. Taro may be the most insipid character I've ever endured, but based on the script, I have to guess that's how he was written, and the young actor playing him pulls off "annoying whiner" with devastating proficiency. Newcomer Nozomi Ando performs admirably as Sakuya, kicking demon ass and looking cute while doing it. She looks like she stepped right out of one of those "Samurai Shodown" games. It's not exactly a deep character she's playing, but as far as generic sword-swinging action gals go, you could do worse. In only an hour and a half, she can't really develop the depth of character Buffy enjoys.

The two ninjas are there to grumble, shout, and blow a lot of stuff up, and they do just that, while the Spider Queen is so good in her few scenes involving dialogue other than proclamations about destroying humanity that you'll almost feel sympathetic for the demons - an emotional manipulation that Taro couldn't pull off, even though that was supposed to be his job. Had she spent more time with the little bastard, I'm sure even the Spider Queen would have reconsidered her bid to win him over to the demon way.

Sakuya's big problem is that it's a good film. Not a great film, but a good film. It would have been a kick-ass television series, but it's not high enough up there in the world of film to survive its own weakest link, Taro. In a better film, the good would have outweighed the bad, but in a movie on the level Sakuya achieves, he's enough to drag it down from "good" to "average" and transform it into a movie that, rather than looking forward to seeing, you should probably check out if you get the easy opportunity. Sakuya herself is all killer, no filler, and the special effects are aces, but the movie itself is pretty "business as usual" for this particular genre. When Amamiya has movies out there like Moon Over Tao, Renegade Robot Ninja, and Zeiram II, there's no need to subject yourself to Taro. Even without him, those movies outclass this one, which is ultimately nothing more than a popcorn flick, but boy howdy does it deliver in all the right places.

A more solid plot would have helped it weather the Taro storm a bit better. As is, his blustering whining mucks up the front yard and leaves things less enjoyable than they could have been, should have been. As I stated earlier, this would have been a great television series, because then we would have been allowed time to get to know the characters better. Sakuya has a lot of potential - a young girl who is destined to fight a war using the Vortex Sword, thus causing her own young life to grow ever shorter lest she quench the blade with human blood. That's fuel for a great character and some good action-adventure drama. Confined to a mere ninety minutes or so, Sakuya's development is eschewed and we instead concentrate on Taro - himself a character that might not have been so painful if he'd been given more emotional depth. Unfortunately, the only characterization the movie has time for is "whiner," and the heroics he predictably performs at the end are less a natural outgrowth of his character and more just a simple function of plot conventions.

With Taro firmly in place, and with the story being what it is, my recommendation becomes shakier and less certain. Sure, this movie has an ultra-cool heroine, some great action, slick monsters, surreal cinematography and art design, and generally cool special effects. but it also has Taro, a pesky insect buzzing in your ear that simply will not go away no matter how many times you swat at him. The end result is a movie that is watchable, even fun, but definitely flawed and frustrating since you'll keep thinking of how much better it could have been with just a few less scenes of that screeching little kappa sumbitch.

Labels: Country: Japan, Fantasy, Horror: Yokai, Year: 2000