Man, if you ever needed a movie that would make you appreciate the first Bloodrayne more, this is it. Bloodrayne may not have been classic cinema, but at least it was idiotic and had a whole bunch of embarrassed actors like SIR Ben Kingsley, Michael Madsen, and Billy Zane. When you can embarrass Madsen and Zane, now that's something. Plus, part one had Michelle Rodriguez starring as Michelle Rodriguez in one of the most idiotic outfits I've ever seen.

Part two, by comparison, has...um, that chick with the purple hair from DOA, and Michael Pare, whose career no longer allows him to be embarrassed by any role. And rather than try to make any sort of action-horror film, Uwe Boll elects to make a really boring spaghetti western with lots of wannabe Leone close-ups and music and scenes that seem to end, and then you cut back to them ten minutes later, and they're actually still going on (the whole "we should help them!" scene with the townsfolk during the finale never ends). There's almost no vampire action at all, other than a guy biting a couple of kids (oh, how daring Uwe!). everything else is straight-forward western action, provided that you consider "action" to be people standing around and mumbling dumb lines while doing nothing.

When they finally get around to the big, idiotic shoot-out, it's at night (why do people always fight vampires at night???) and lit so that you can hardly see anything. It's full of things like the bad guys cornering a couple good guys and, rather than killing them, standing around for literally ten minutes while the good guys light cigarellos, eat communion wafers, cock their pistols, and utter lines while fake Morricone music plays. The vampires pretty much die whenever you shoot, them, except for once or twice when it's inconvenient to the plot.

Nastassia Malthe looks good in her leather cowgirl outfit, but man what a dull character and what a bad actress. Zach ward plays Billy the Kid (who is a vampire) as a fey European dandy. Actually, it looks like he was bitten by a radioactive Billy Drago. As Pat Garret, Michale Pare just sort of wanders around with a beard. The rest of the cast is pretty terrible, but it's not like they're given very much to work with.

Now keep in mind that I enjoy me an Uwe Boll film. But this one lacks any of the "so horrible it becomes wonderful" aspects of his previous work and becomes just plain boring. It does away with the gore of part one (save for a couple squib-happy shootings and hanging a little kid), as well as lacking Ben Kingsley mincing about in a big robe and speaking in monotone. Vampires in the old west was a potentially cool and/or awful but fun story idea. Uwe Boll, unfortunately, doesn't deliver either, and instead Bloodrayne 2 becomes a long procession of lifeless, poorly-lit shots of people rambling off pointless dialog until, eventually, Michael Pare shoots a vampire with a Gatling Gun. And even that is really boring, believe it or not. You are much better off wasting your time with House of the Dead or that movie where Tara Reid is a brilliant scientist in a cave.